Who Wants Cake?

Full disclosure. Okay, so today started out great. Made a super delicious late breakfast, crispy sweet potato hash, sautéed mushrooms, roasted asparagus, carmelized onions, three runny eggs. I wasn’t that hungry for lunch so I only had half a grapefruit (my new obsession, by the way), and a handful of almonds.

Today is my sister-in-law’s birthday, so we wanted to have dinner together. My brother decided on Indian, I figured I could navigate my way around it. I thought, no cake, no ice cream, maybe a bite of rice. What ended up happening was I ate everything, way too much of it and indulged in cake and ice cream. Result? I am so full and a bit uncomfortable. But I made the choice to eat everything that I did, no one forced me. The Hub even tried to stop me. But I hadn’t eaten Indian food in so long, it smelled and looked so good, I couldn’t stop myself. But now I’m definitely paying for it. I am so bloated, it’s not funny.

Tomorrow I’m going to take it easy, drink a lot of water and eat very light, getting back on track, I promise.

Coming to the end of a holiday weekend here, and I told myself that I would start eating clean again tomorrow.  Yup, Paleo/Primal, 30 days, and I’m actually looking forward to it, it’s not as scary this time.  I think I do better with some structure, like someone else is making the choices for me.

The farmer’s markets are starting so it seems like the perfect time to do this again, and do the full 30 days.  The only exception I will be making is when I have to taste food at work, and that can still be done within reason anyways. 

Yay, Paleo!  That’s right, I just cheered for my diet, such a nerd.

It’s been a week since my birthday, and Sunday was Mother’s Day, so let’s just say there was a lot of cake and chocolate consumed around here. I’m starting to feel like I need to reset myself again and start a new Whole 30, or my own modified version of it, time to eat clean!

I have also been in a cooking rut when it comes to feeding the kids. Since the Hub works most nights, I keep meal time fairly simple when it’s me and the girls. Pasta and pizza are an easy sell, as are soup and sandwiches. Sometimes they like meat, other times not. As a chef, people think my kids eat everything, but it’s not true. It’s frustrating watching them play with their food and hear the Lady ask over and over what’s for dessert before she has barely taken one bite. The Babe shows her disinterest by simply throwing her bowl over the edge of her high chair, fun times.

Of course there are times when they surprise me, like when they happily eat sautéed spinach or steamed broccoli and cauliflower. It boggles my mind that the Lady doesn’t like grilled cheese. The Babe thinks peas are toys. My kids aren’t necessarily picky, just stuck in the same routines, unfortunately, and I want to try and change that. We live by the “one bite” rule, they have to have at least one bite of something before they decide not to eat it. We all need a little shake up, I guess.

When we went to pick up the Lady from school today, I got into talking to some other moms about this topic, coincidentally. They struggle with the same meal time issues, and I was relieved to know that I’m not alone. We compared notes, like which meal is the toughest to serve and what we think is okay to get them by nutritionally. Feeling a sense of mom-unity is something I need every now and then, and I’m lucky to know and learn from some fantastic moms.

Dinner tonight? Mini pita pizzas with nitrate-free ham, veggies and two cheeses, the Lady’s choice. Strawberry yogurt and a little dark chocolate (no chocolate for the Babe, of course) made for a nice kid-friendly meal. No pizza for me, though.

Yesterday I turned 41. I don’t feel different, I look a little different thanks to a sweet haircut I got a couple of days ago. I had no big plans anyways, aside from starting my new job and hanging with the girls after, the Hub had to work.

My first day at the neighbourhood cafe was fun. It was the chef/owner and I in the kitchen, slinging some sandwiches and a few brunchy dishes too. I helped to prep some things for Mother’s Day weekend, and got to know where things were and even learned how to make mayo with a hand blender, which is surprisingly easy. I felt like I had seen the same thing done in one of those hand blender infomercials, it was fun. Yup, I just said making mayo with a hand blender was fun, a good sign. The server working was also very nice and I felt very comfortable right away, but I was still careful not to feel too comfy and say something dumb, I do that sometimes.

After work I came home and was greeted by a lovely black and white cakelet from my favourite bakery, with candles and a steaming cup of tea. I forgot to take a pic with the candles, but I like that the pic had pieces missing, it was so good, moist and chocolatey, perfect with my tea. Then the Hub hurried to get ready for work and I relaxed with the Lady while the Babe napped, she was exhausted from playing outside most of the afternoon.

I decided to treat us all to a pizza for dinner, I didn’t feel like cooking and crossed my fingers that my stomach could take it. It was from a really good pizzeria down the street, so it arrived quickly and we all enjoyed it. Maybe half an hour later my stomach started to grumble and cramp, turns out pizza is no longer friends with me, but I was in denial. Time to find a good gluten free pizza dough recipe, I think.

The rest of my birthday was like most nights, I bathed the girls and put them to bed, then relaxed with some TV and reading. It may not have been a big party, but I received so many sweet messages and phone calls, and I liked the quiet time. It was a very happy birthday, indeed.

Oh, and cake for breakfast this morning was pretty awesome too.

A year ago today I started this whole blog journey, and I’m glad that I did. It’s been a year of baked goods (and bads), a new home, a sandwich job and family meals. There’s been 30 day challenges, food memories and a new Paleo way of eating. And of course there will always be the Hub, the Lady and the Babe. I love you, forever. And to the small handful of people that have come here to read and cheer me on, thank you so much. Looking forward to sharing more cake. xo

Since my anniversary dinner, I have been trying to eat clean, but I have had my slips here and there. I have come to realize that it is easier to be strict with myself, that I kind of liked having the boundaries, because without them I give in to eating things that I really shouldn’t. Where I used to pause and think before, now my old instincts kick in, not every time, but more than I would like and I eat junk, and then I feel horrible after.

I also started to have physical reactions to food that I didn’t have after my anniversary. We took the Lady to a kid’s birthday party and I had a couple slices of pizza. The next morning the roof of my mouth and gums were swollen and sore, and that lasted for a few days. My sister-in-law said that her trainer, who also eats Paleo, gets the same reaction if he cheats and eats bread. Very interesting. I found myself eating foods just for the sake of seeing what would happen to me, and so far bread has given me the most response. If I eat too many sugary foods I get a headache a few hours later and need to sleep it off.

So the newest thing that I have been thinking about is going gluten free. I have been reading two really good blogs lately, Gluten Free Girl and the Chef, and Roost. They are both beautifully written, have gorgeous pictures (especially Roost), and the recipes are ones that I feel inspired to try. And of course, I want to buy some books to learn more, I can never have enough books!

My food journey continues to twist and turn in directions that I didn’t expect, but pleasantly so. I’m also considering trying another 30 day Paleo stint after my birthday, that’s in a week, by the way, in case you were wondering.

After working at Robert’s Restaurant for 3 years, my next job was working in a hospital kitchen.  I was interested in becoming a dietician at the time, and my mom knew someone that helped to fast track my application.  Next thing I knew I was interviewed, took a tour of the kitchen and was fitted for a very unstylish light blue wraparound uniform.  We also had to wear pantyhose, hair nets and white shoes.  I opted to wear white high top sneakers, to be cool, of course.

It was a fairly easy job, and I actually really liked it.  Each person was assigned a different station to work at beside a long conveyer belt.  Menus and trays are placed on the belt, and the rest of the line puts the food and drinks on according to what is marked on the menu.  The trays are loaded onto carts and they are brought up to the floors and served.  After the meals are finished it was also our job to wash all the trays, dishes and cutlery.  My favourite job was serving the hot food, either the meat/protein station, or the vegetable station.  There was something about gathering up the scoops, ladles and tongs that I found satisfying.  And I simply enjoyed plating the food, I still do.  When I first started, the food was mostly made from scratch, by real chefs, and was very tasty.  A few years later there were a lot of cutbacks and the food was more processed and cheaper, which seemed wrong to me.  We were in a hospital, after all, shouldn’t the food be healthy?

I worked there for about 7 years, I even worked weekends for a while when I moved to the big city to go to cooking school, commuting by bus for 2 hours each way and staying with my parents.  That job was my safety net and comfort zone.  Not just for the money, that really good money, but for all the friendships I made.  I met my first roommates there.  Almost all of the friends I hung out with worked there.  We worked together and played together, they were some of the best times of my life.  I was young, free and independent.  I felt like I could do anything.  I never did become a dietician though.  

I’ve been thinking about this job lately, I applied for a dietary aide job that a friend told me about, and all the memories came back to me.  I’m sure the job has changed quite a bit since then, I wondered if I would even like it as much.  Unfortunately I never heard from the hospital, so I went on with my search.  Last week I did a trial shift at a neighbourhood cafe I applied at, and today I met with the owner to accept the job.  I start next week.